more dreams.

March 15, 2007: I was at the Denver art museum with Amarantha, and we were going through an exhibit that I really liked. I went through some random notebooks that they had out for anyone to write on, because I wanted to write a note to myself of an artist's name whose installation I liked. I found papers with lots of weird symbols on them, almost like my father's stock market notes. During all this, or on the way to doing this, Amarantha walked by some kind of giant mystical puzzle on display and accidentally kicked the last piece in place. Everyone in the museum was really excited. I went around looking for her, to make sure she knew what she had done. She knew, and then she waited for me to take down my note.

I'm not sure if this was even the same dream as the last. I was in Home Depot, I think, and I watched a man install a temporary fan to air out an aisle. The fan was really filthy and gross. Then I was about to eat a large stack of slices of cheese. One of the workers at Home Depot invited me to eat dinner with them at Denny's or some place like it. Then I overheard another worker complaining that I was gay and that he wasn't comfortable with that. Anyway, I got in their car and joined them, and before the supervisors (one of whom was the one who invited me) could get in the car, they slammed the door, and we went high speed down an aisle. Home Depot in the dream was vast, the aisles were road-size, and there were hills and such. I was still eating my slices of cheese. The driver stopped paying attention to the road, but remarkably never crashed. It was as though the car was on a train track. And the entire scene of their escape was as if we were at the very end of a movie and they had finally freed themselves.

March 13, 2007: I was sleeping on the floor in Alex's parent's dining room, and around 3 AM, Mrs. Santillanes woke up and quietly came down to the kitchen. She was in the beginning phases of preparing something, I think, calmly cutting some cucumbers when she suddenly thrusted her whole body across the counter and shoved everything aside, making a loud scream as she did it. [In real life, she's a very calm, quiet and thoughtful lady, so this was like seeing her finally vent.] She went into the living room area, and I was worried she had reacted that way because I was there. I said, "should I sleep in a different room?" Then she explained to me that she's been getting this way lately because she eats fast food and it keeps her up at night.

March 8, 2007: I just dreamt that I was walking in front of a house in a neighborhood I'd like to live in. And someone was pointing out the insect life and said I'd especially relate to the scorpion. The scorpion was hunting amongst an array of insects right there with him. And then he casually walked away, then turned around quickly and just kinda chose the millipede. And then they were talking, and the scorpion complimented the millipede's website, and by then, the millipede was entering the poisonous vacuums of the scorpion (not like scorpions in reality). And the millipede responded, "I can't see the internet anymore, now that you've taken over my neural system." And as he said that, the music shifted from a twangy lull to a bunch of fast-bowed violins, like in Jaws. And it felt to me like suddenly my intestines were being entered from the belly button area. And that feeling woke me up. Later I had a dream that I had adopted a cat, but she ended up being like a daughter. And I had to put her to bed, etc. All the while, I was worried that I had suddenly taken on too much responsibility in my life.

February 28, 2007: I was in a building where "a lot of things happened"—apparently I had hung out with Jill ages ago in the building, and I was very nostalgic—and I went there while hanging out with some guy who then created an online going-away party out of some kind of temporary buddy list theme. People—not necessarily friends of mine—Imed me with random lower-case Greek letters as pet nicknames for me, like "my little (pi symbol)" and then a random song from my iTunes was somehow selected, but I didn't and don't like most of the songs on my iTunes, so it seemed uncomfortable for everyone including me. And during all this, we were in Barrack Obama's house, and it was a big night for Obama. It would be the night Obama would cheat on his wife, if that ever were to happen. And this guy and I were in the guest room, and I was sprawled out on the bed half-naked basically waiting for Obama. And then the guy I was hanging out with looked at me funny and told me he felt bad and looked embarrassed. Because the buddy list theme that he created apparently incorporated an element to the response system that implied that any and all of the responders wanted to sleep with me and pay money. Later, in the morning, when I came home—I apparently lived on the first floor of some motel-looking place—Obama's wife was singing a song in French to herself outside as she watered the plants. I went in, and Jason and Meredith were over [the friends with whom I went to the S&M dinner in real life], and also Brad, a guy from Virginia I got drinks with once. Brad and Jason looked cuddly, so I figured they were now dating. Alex was there, too, showing everyone Neko Case live performances from YouTube. Later I had a dream that my father had another child from a different woman, but my parents wouldn't let me babysit him.

February 27, 2007: I was visiting the Marksteiners after going to Las Cruces or somewhere. While in Las Cruces I saw lots of Native Americans, and I'm not sure why I was there. Maybe to do some kind of social research. No, I think I was waiting for a GAP store to open. Las Cruces ended up being Durango even though I went south. Then at the Marksteiners' house, I hung out with Liz. [Liz is a childhood friend of mine who died five years ago of cancer. Her parents were/are Catholic military Republican weightlifting champions.] Then their dog came into my room during a nap, and we cuddled. But the dog ended up being [Liz's brother] Tony, and he grabbed my hand and brought me to the bed and spooned me facing face down. Then his father came in while Tony was holding me from behind, and he asked Tony to show me something. Tony opened a closet full of perfumes and soaps, and the father went hunting through for a cinnamon black cherry flavored one. And then Tony found me another. There were more scented things there than what you would find in a store. Liz might have attempted suicide in the closet. And I felt like I was in love with Tony. Early in the dream was something about my grandmother. Oh, and Lorelei called while I was with Tony; she was upset because she bought something that broke.